Long-distance relationships suck. I get it. All three of my significant relationships have involved long distance in some way. As a young man who was terrified of any sort of commitment, I found that I could only allow myself to fall for a girl if she was at least miles away. The second time, we both agreed that our lives were taking us to different parts of the world and we were probably better off letting it go βwe then struggled to, you know, actually let go for another year, and it sucked.
The third time, and perhaps because we had both done this before, we immediately made plans to end the distance as soon as possible six months , and then made the appropriate sacrifices to do so.
One of the things that kill long-distance relationships is the constant underlying uncertainty of everything. The longer you are apart, the more these uncertainties can grow into legitimate existential crises. Usually, this will be the next time you are both able to see each other. The minute you stop having some milestone to look forward to, the harder it will be to maintain the same enthusiasm for, and optimism in, each other. And growth is even more crucial in a long-distance relationship.
You must have some cause that unites you at all times. There has to be a converging trajectory on the horizon. Otherwise, you will inevitably drift apart.
Dump the toxic relationship cycle with my free mini course on attachment styles. Your information is protected and I never spam, ever. You can view my privacy policy here. This can manifest itself in various ways within a long-distance relationship. In some cases, people get insanely jealous or irrationally possessive because they perceive every casual social outing as potentially threatening to a relationship. Are you hiding something from me?
