Atlanta's Subby School is a hybrid of support group and skill-sharing class that connects BDSM submissives with each other. On an overcast Sunday afternoon in February, I entered a small fluorescent-lit room inside an office strip mall in Northeast Atlanta for a meeting of Subby School, a support and educational program for BDSM submissives. A plastic panda piggy bank stood on one table so that attendees could give donations. Others bring snacks instead. Notepads sat in a pile, ready for members to take.
Like an AA meeting, Subby School is discreet. Few people write their legal names on the name tags provided, for good reason. People involved in kink can lose custody of their children or be fired from their jobs. Case law has established that consent is not a defense to assault, including relatively mild BDSM acts like playing with a riding crop or dripping hot wax on someone without burning them.
Fourteen people were in attendance. They ranged in age from early 20s to mids, mostly white, with all manner of gender presentations.
One woman came with a plush unicorn in tow. A man with a gray goatee and curled mustache passed out Disney chocolate valentines to everyone. He asked Jinni for permission to eat, then eagerly dipped a cheese slice into garlic butter. Her second wife became her dominant, or dom, after she became interested in BDSM. Zakree finished eating and sat down in a chair next to Jinni.
Zakree got up and moved to the next chair in the circle. Then, fellow Subby School cofounder Snow who requested a pseudonym to protect her privacy , a year-old married mother of two and corporate manager with bright red hair and a black choker around her neck, called the meeting to order.
